finger smoke
Created on: February 18th, 2008
finger smoke
max 
I chopped off the tip of my right index finger cutting an onion on an extremely sharp mandoline.

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8 http://forums.ytmnsfw.com/showthread.html?t=106567
3 http://www6.kingdomofloathing.com/lchat.php
3 http://ytmnsfw.com/users/max/
2 http://127.0.0.1:60080/lchat.php
2 http://www3.kingdomofloathing.com/lchat.php

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<< 1 2 >>
February 18th, 2008
(14)
mad gross
February 18th, 2008
(14)
What did it taste like?
February 18th, 2008
(10)
VAT DE FAK?
February 18th, 2008
(13)
For the record, this is the first site ever to have mandoline in the keywords.
February 18th, 2008
(2)
ILL BUY IT FOR 9001 US DOLLARS
February 18th, 2008
(4)
No, seriously, Max, you've got my sympathy. But seriously, you should go on the Colbert Report or something.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(0)
i did this same thing yesterday except with an exacto knife making a stencil, it was the top of my finger though, and i didn't sell it on ebay, i threw it away
February 18th, 2008
(0)
been there, done that. i feel your pain.
February 18th, 2008
(4)
where's the crazy glue?
February 18th, 2008
(-4)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-4)
this site will be killed™
February 18th, 2008
(-17)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-17)
5'd for Max.
February 18th, 2008
(-29)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-29)
I'll buy your finger for $1,000,000 if you make DarthWang featured
February 18th, 2008
(-1)
February 18th, 2008
(3)
Hey Max! Whats up buddy?
February 18th, 2008
(35)
Also, This is why I use razor gator.
February 18th, 2008
(-17)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-17)
Seriously... I will pay $1,000,000 for the finger and sponsor this for $1,000,000, all I want is for DARTHWANG TO BECOME A [FORGETTING] FEATURED USER!
February 18th, 2008
(3)
Why are you using a mandoline? Get a good knife for f*cks sake.
February 18th, 2008
(9)
Hey, let me know when you get this up on ebay. I've been looking for some new fingerprints for this, uh, thing I've gotta do.
February 18th, 2008
(-17)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-17)
WHY ARE YOU MINUSING MY COMMENTS ABOUT DARTHWANG BEING FEATURED? HE'S CREATED OVER 1100, MAYBE 1200 SITES, NEVER USED A SINGLE ALT *COUGH FOUREST COUGH* AND WOULD MAKE THE FRONTPAGE FUNNY.
February 18th, 2008
(1)
whoa...rock on Captain.
February 18th, 2008
(-11)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-11)
see my last comment in that chain was downvoted probably by a fourest alt
February 18th, 2008
(0)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(0)
Sup max, lern 2 knives plz, thx.
February 18th, 2008
(4)
I'll take it for $200! but im only gonna have sex with it
February 18th, 2008
(34)
That is the worst circumcision I've ever seen.
February 19th, 2008
(5)
I don't want to be a pinkf*g
February 19th, 2008
(3)
^Reverse psychology^
February 19th, 2008
(1)
No, it's the truth
February 19th, 2008
(0)
Riiiiight ;-)
February 20th, 2008
(2)
Never pet snakes on a plane.
February 20th, 2008
(7)
YOUR NAIL IS DEAD , LANDO IS NOT !!!!!!
February 23rd, 2008
(1)
hockey music
February 23rd, 2008
(0)
mad hot
March 3rd, 2008
(1)
Hey, max! That's the finger I licked when you were in Chicago! Remember that? Way to not come to our party.
February 18th, 2008
(1)
ouch.
February 20th, 2008
(-1)
vat de fak?
February 18th, 2008
(-1)
rawr.
February 18th, 2008
(1)
roit jeledv.
February 18th, 2008
(1)
you probably didnt need that finger anyway
February 18th, 2008
(3)
*obligatory mod-system-taking-too-long-even-before-max-could-only-count-to-9 comment*
February 18th, 2008
(-1)
SH*T SUX MAX
February 18th, 2008
(2)
link the auction when you post it
February 19th, 2008
(0)
And to think 100 years ago they wouldn't imagine us selling our smallest pieces of ourselves online for suprisingly good amount (I have faith that people will buy your finger nail max)
February 21st, 2008
(1)
Id buy it. And then make several ytmnds using it.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
LOLOLOLOL FINGERSSSSSSSSSSSSSss
February 18th, 2008
(2)
max bleeds not for he is god
February 18th, 2008
(-15)
[ comment (and 5 replies) is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-15)
lol i downvoted max' s site because i'm not a pussy.
February 18th, 2008
(3)
im so gonna clone a max now.
February 18th, 2008
(6)
then the alternate universes will be complete!
March 8th, 2008
(1)
Yes! Yes!
February 18th, 2008
(-1)
0.0 at first I thought that was some kind of slimy sea food, but I looked closer and saw the tru7h!
February 18th, 2008
(2)
did the onion at least taste god?
February 18th, 2008
(1)
If this fad catches on, I'll 5 every single one of them at warp speed.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
http://www.dugged.com/view_video.php?viewkey=194c475687be6106a3b8
February 18th, 2008
(8)
by this I mean people cutting off thieir fingers..
February 23rd, 2008
(0)
XD
February 18th, 2008
(2)
This is f*ckin gross.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
I can't believe it's not a FINGER!!!!!!!
February 18th, 2008
(2)
Max plays the mandolin?
February 18th, 2008
(0)
OH NO!!! THATS THE FINGER YOU USE TO CLICK YOUR MOUSE WITH!!! YTMND IS DONE!!!!
February 18th, 2008
(0)
good beatnuts track. sorry bout the digit dude
February 18th, 2008
(9)
I want to make some joke about jewish guys getting the tip of their prick chopped off and tie it into the finger tip site here but I'm too sleepy to think of anything good
February 18th, 2008
(0)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(0)
And then you snip . . . the tip!
February 18th, 2008
(4)
Looks tasty.. I'll trade you my fruit c*cktail for it
February 18th, 2008
(4)
also c*cktails.
February 18th, 2008
(3)
With clubsauce.
February 18th, 2008
(1)
ewwwwwwwwwww
February 18th, 2008
(0)
But wait a second.. where's the gratuitous amounts of blood and gore associated with slicing off one's own fingertip?
February 18th, 2008
(12)
The mandoline I have is two extremely sharp razor blades in a V shape, it was an extremely clean cut and the tip had no blood on it when it came off. My bathroom looks like a murder scene though.
February 18th, 2008
(41)
after drinking a bottle of whiskey and rubbing sawdust in my wounds i had no need to get anything reattached.
August 12th, 2010
(0)
This was a reply to a comment that is no longer there.
February 18th, 2008
(3)
^ spoken like a real man.
February 18th, 2008
(-1)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-1)
I hope you feel better Max. Was you using the food holder?
February 18th, 2008
(2)
Were you using... I'm illiterate. :-(
February 18th, 2008
(2)
I have the video http://tip.ytmnd.com/
February 19th, 2008
(1)
hospitals typically don't re-attach severed fingertips anyway, unless it's a considerable chunk or at least has like, a joint or something in it
February 19th, 2008
(1)
It will grow back anyway B) just take some steroids
February 20th, 2008
(1)
Can't you superglue it back on?
February 20th, 2008
(0)
please add bathroom scene.
February 26th, 2008
(2)
"The mandoline I have is two extremely sharp razor blades in a V shape" Should have used Razor Gator.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
So many comments already!
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Awesome Awkwardness!
February 18th, 2008
(14)
This site just proves how f*cking crazy Max has grown over the years, maintaining a site where half the people don't appreciate a damn thing he does. 6 months from now, he is gonna disappear off the face of the planet for a week until he is arrested in France for murdering a couple that he believes "Rick Roll'd" him. When they show him being carried away on the news, we will all probably see him shouting for BTape and Syncan for post bail for him. Also, 5.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(0)
Hmm, for those that are downvoting my comment, is it because it was a stupid comment to begin with, because I voted 5 or because of both?
February 18th, 2008
(-3)
Because you acknowledged the comment downvoters, and that makes you seem the tool.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Reminds me of the time I nearly lost a finger when I stuck it into a moving fan when I was about 4 years old.
February 23rd, 2008
(0)
some people are just smart like that... they get to join the club... first rule is dont talk about finger club... second rule dont talk about finger club... third rule is im alowed to break the first and second rule... i cant remember the rest
February 18th, 2008
(8)
You're gonna like the way you look, I guarentee it.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Toothbrush WTF?
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Aw . . .
February 18th, 2008
(-1)
How did you remove your entire fingernail?
February 18th, 2008
(0)
That's the fingertip with a little piece of the nail. Extreme closeup FTL
February 18th, 2008
(0)
My condolences. I hope you didn't play the piano.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
10
April 1st, 2008
(3)
9 now.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Typing must be a bitch
February 19th, 2008
(0)
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Knives are safer
February 18th, 2008
(-2)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-2)
im commenting on a site by max
February 18th, 2008
(-3)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-3)
so how long after cutting your finger off did it take you before you thought to make a site out of it
February 18th, 2008
(2)
Did you put it between your teeth and play with it?
February 18th, 2008
(0)
that can't possibly be THE max. ...max is black.
February 18th, 2008
(-5)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-5)
Pfffffffffft. Why don't you try doing something useful around here for once?
February 18th, 2008
(0)
I did that once, but with a knife, dicing red bell peppers. I went around for days after with my middle finger with a fat bandage, looking like I was flipping everyone the naughty finger.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Damn, Max. I want that, to have. Hope it heals up nicely, though, that's a lot of finger meat.
February 18th, 2008
(1)
*violently pukes*
February 18th, 2008
(0)
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow
February 18th, 2008
(2)
Hospital...ytmnd...hospital...ytmnd....
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Give me advice, I need to remove my toenail. It's ingrowing and painful!
February 18th, 2008
(7)
FROM WHENCE YOU CAME, YOU SHALL REMAIN! UNTIL YOU ARE, COMPLETE AGAIN!
February 18th, 2008
(3)
I teared up this was so great
February 18th, 2008
(8)
max turn your fingernail into a guitar pick
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Addicts always make excuses ... it's clear you're a body-mod fetishist.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
F*cking disgusting. I hope you're left-handed, Max.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
ow
February 18th, 2008
(0)
I used to have to clean a Hobart slicer, very very dangerous. Respect slicers.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Don't use it to trim your high heels. Or your finger
February 18th, 2008
(0)
or your c*ck
February 18th, 2008
(1)
MAX!!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BY GOD ARE YOU ALRIGHT!!! MAX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
February 18th, 2008
(2)
GOOD GOD SOLDIER
February 19th, 2008
(0)
He has incurred an injury upholding the lol. Award this brave max a purple star.
February 18th, 2008
(3)
who is max? why should i care? are you mad? do you feel blame?
February 18th, 2008
(1)
i smell a spin-off site with Max dressing his wound in a grungy motel bathroom like so much action film
February 18th, 2008
(2)
February 18th, 2008
(2)
February 28th, 2008
(-1)
I ain't afraid of no ghost comments.
February 18th, 2008
(-8)
[ comment (and 2 replies) is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-8)
lol your some emo kid cutting your fingers off lol what a f*g eat sh*t and die
February 18th, 2008
(0)
February 18th, 2008
(-1)
Good job guy...
February 18th, 2008
(0)
D: ... That just so happens to be my fetish.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
i want to be red
February 18th, 2008
(0)
I cut off almost all the meat on one of my pinky fingers once. I don't even remember which one, it didn't leave a scar at all.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
that is so metal
February 18th, 2008
(-1)
Link 2 ebay thing when its ready. Also, ouch.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
OWNED
February 18th, 2008
(-1)
Judging by the size of that fingernail, you must have a big finger.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
LOL nub
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Max, you okay?
February 18th, 2008
(0)
I hope you have health insurance.
February 18th, 2008
(1)
5 because my vote doesn't matter
February 18th, 2008
(-7)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-7)
FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG FEATURE DARTHWANG
February 18th, 2008
(3)
Spoilers..........................................................................................................Max is a JEW!!!!!
February 18th, 2008
(-2)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-2)
who won't feature darthwang
February 20th, 2008
(0)
who sucks and is unoriginal
February 18th, 2008
(0)
lol
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Hey bud, I like your eclectic taste in musics...you should waste a bunch of time making a mix tape for me. I'll send you a cassette.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Incredible.
February 18th, 2008
(0)
in informative ytmnd
February 18th, 2008
(0)
for not helping me when i needed it you only get a 4 lol aww what the hell i lol'd have a 5
February 18th, 2008
(5)
confess max, that's the tip of your peener isn't it
February 18th, 2008
(0)
also sorry about your finger.
February 19th, 2008
(0)
that's one way to get a circumcision!!!
February 19th, 2008
(0)
Mazel Tov! Shall I bring Manischevitz to the Briss?
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Ew.
February 18th, 2008
(1)
you aren't allowed to sell body parts on ebay it's one of their rules :(
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Now your finger and the keyboard are fully compatible.
February 18th, 2008
(1)
Do you have to let it linger?
February 18th, 2008
(0)
I once smashed my finger on my desk and ripped half my fingernail off while making a site.
February 19th, 2008
(0)
I broke my finger throwing my cellphone. I also lost my entire fingernail after closing my middle finger in the hinge side of a heavy door. Getting punched in the balls hurts much worse.
February 19th, 2008
(0)
You broke your finger throwing your cell phone!?!?! How the F*CK did you do that?
February 19th, 2008
(1)
cocaine is a helluva drug
February 18th, 2008
(0)
jesus fkkn christ... i have nothing else to say...
February 18th, 2008
(-1)
ew.....so, is that just the finger nail then eh?
February 18th, 2008
(0)
Yum!
February 19th, 2008
(1)
are you sure it wasnt ninjas?
February 19th, 2008
(0)
that stupid ad just said OMG, NOWAI!!
February 19th, 2008
(0)
I WANT BIZARRO MAX CLONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
February 19th, 2008
(2)
Didn't know software development was so hardcore.
February 19th, 2008
(0)
Damn. O_O You can't get it re-attached or anything?
February 19th, 2008
(3)
so your finger is now jewish?
February 19th, 2008
(2)
The perfect addition to any salad!
February 19th, 2008
(1)
This is why you shouldn't smoke crack and try to cut your fingernails.
February 19th, 2008
(1)
at least you weren't cutting those onions with your dick.
February 19th, 2008
(0)
Holy sh*t.
February 19th, 2008
(0)
4'd for an interesting story
February 19th, 2008
(0)
Cool publicity stunt.
February 19th, 2008
(0)
What the heck is this?
February 19th, 2008
(0)
3 because I like the music. :o)
February 19th, 2008
(2)
Max, you never look at my sites, but I THINK you might like this one--- http://theytookmythumb.ytmnd.com/
February 19th, 2008
(4)
I'm holding out for the fleshlight/piano wire incident in 2009
February 19th, 2008
(-2)
[ comment (and 1 replies) is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-2)
=( emo
February 19th, 2008
(1)
MAH BOI! WHEN WILL THIS BE ON eBAY?
February 19th, 2008
(0)
OW
February 19th, 2008
(1)
Pillowy mounds of sliced phalanges.
February 19th, 2008
(0)
YUMMY
February 20th, 2008
(1)
Gross, but to be fair it took me a while to realize what part of a finger I was looking at.
February 20th, 2008
(1)
On the bright side, it should grow back in a few weeks. I did something like this to the tip of my left hand middle finger while cutting cord with a pocket knife. Oddly enough, it was my righthand thumb fingernail which gouged out a plug from the other finger tip. It bled for a long time, but it healed rather nicely. End of story. :-)
February 20th, 2008
(0)
I don't even know what to give this....meh when in doubt give a 4.
February 20th, 2008
(0)
I will donate 100 dollars to a site of your choosing if that eBay auction sells over 500 bucks.
February 20th, 2008
(0)
Ow, dude,ow.
February 20th, 2008
(0)
if someone buy it make sure they don't clone you
February 20th, 2008
(1)
I will purchase this and use the prints to commit heinous crimes
February 22nd, 2008
(0)
Killing hobos?
February 20th, 2008
(1)
NSFW
February 20th, 2008
(1)
are the other 9 tips goin up on ebay at some point? i'm only interested if theres a potential rare collection at stake
February 20th, 2008
(0)
OW.
February 20th, 2008
(0)
I'm shocked, I'm horrified, and I can't look away :|
February 20th, 2008
(0)
You are one glorious bastard.
February 20th, 2008
(0)
Holy crap, a meteor!
February 20th, 2008
(0)
This might be your best YTMND.
February 20th, 2008
(0)
that gave me a boner
February 20th, 2008
(0)
That's right, I'll make a million Max clones, and then send them all TO YOUR HOUSE WHERE YOU WILL BE INFESTED WITH PEOPLE WITH BAD IDEAS THAT RELATE TO THE INTERNET! MUAHAHAHAHA!
February 20th, 2008
(0)
This is a dangerous utensil and food preparers may choose to wear a metal glove on the pushing hand.
February 20th, 2008
(0)
F*ckin' gross! I don't wanna see that sh*t!
February 20th, 2008
(0)
I did the same thing cutting a quesadilla while watching the world cup when I was in college working at hooters. It sucked. Then it was like "PUT IT UNDER WATER!"- "OMFG". I'm pretty sure it was in that quesadilla, too.
February 20th, 2008
(0)
oh, and five for clumsy dorks using knives
February 20th, 2008
(0)
OMFG
February 20th, 2008
(-1)
*flinch* Didn't need to see this....
February 20th, 2008
(0)
Holy sh*7.... Ow! That makes me cringe just thinking about it.
February 20th, 2008
(0)
wow dude, get well soon dude. I feel for ya
February 21st, 2008
(0)
"Did you see what God did to me man?" "That wasn't God, it was you...you're a f*cking narcotics agent" Also keywords FTW.
February 21st, 2008
(0)
So how long until you put it on ebay and teknorat buys it?
February 21st, 2008
(0)
I broke YTMND
February 21st, 2008
(0)
Ouch
February 21st, 2008
(0)
What the hell happened?
February 21st, 2008
(0)
SUNNOFABITCH THAT MUST'VE HURT! F*********CK!
February 22nd, 2008
(0)
Well done max, well done. You're super.
February 22nd, 2008
(0)
The Midevil method of Finger Printing.
February 22nd, 2008
(0)
holy sh*t...... can we get an object next to that for some perspective?
February 23rd, 2008
(1)
What made you cry moar, the onion or the sliced finger?
February 24th, 2008
(0)
OH God, That's gross!
February 24th, 2008
(0)
eek
February 26th, 2008
(1)
lol did u still eat the onions
February 27th, 2008
(0)
what the f*ck. seriously. Look at all these f*gs 5ing this site because Max made it. IT SUCKS. 1 star'd
February 27th, 2008
(0)
Great, now i'm hungry. :|
February 29th, 2008
(1)
Yikes, now your lacking meat and that's what real women need. I pine for you.
March 1st, 2008
(0)
something like that happened to myself as well. except it was my left index finger and it was almost cut off...
(0)
God you're sick.
March 3rd, 2008
(0)
BEATNUTS BABY YOU"RE THE BEST THERE IS PSYCH LES YOU"RE THE BEST THERE IS JUJU
March 9th, 2008
(0)
5'd because its max the jew
March 16th, 2008
(0)
Tony Iommi lost 2 of his fingers, and he was still a freaking awesome guitar player. Don't worry about it.
March 18th, 2008
(0)
flibberty joo
March 21st, 2008
(0)
does it grow back?
March 22nd, 2008
(0)
Needs more blood.
March 26th, 2008
(0)
Cuts and the like with sharp objects rarely ever hurt until you realize what the hell just happened, like when I tore a chunk of my right thumb off a few years ago, I was like "where's this blood coming fo-HOLYSH*TI'MGONNADIE"
March 27th, 2008
(0)
WHAT THE F*CK IS A MANDOLINE!?
April 5th, 2008
(0)
Filet O' Fish?
May 13th, 2008
(0)
Why did you do this exactly?
June 20th, 2008
(0)
You know what you could do, you could go to some crappy fast food place (McFatAss) and get a burger or something, then, about halfway through the food substance, stick it in there. Unfortunately, I can't 5 this, cuz that had to hurt.
June 29th, 2008
(0)
OUCH!
August 6th, 2008
(0)
your finger is now like this website - no point (terrible pun i know BUT HOW COULD I RESIST)
February 4th, 2009
(0)
dayyyyyyum.
November 30th, 2009
(0)
This is good work. Can you produce more like it?
January 28th, 2010
(0)
LOL RANDOM.Y
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