My Drunk Wife wants a divorce
Created on: May 31st, 2008
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divorce

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May 31st, 2008
(6)
im not trying to be funny here or get votes, i just really need to cover my *ss if she really divorces me.
August 29th, 2008
(10)
If you think she's pissed now, wait until she finds out you've been recording her.
August 29th, 2008
(16)
Your wife is such a bitch man i really feal bad for you. Have you considered killing her instead of divorcing her so you can keep all your stuff?
August 29th, 2008
(8)
Dude that whole argument was bullsh*t... Your wife is pretty f*ckin dumb.. Sorry... Just dont let her drink.
August 29th, 2008
(0)
"Listen to your nagging... f*ckin... BITCH mouth..."
August 29th, 2008
(0)
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(0)
If you think your *ss is covered now, wait until her lawyer gets wind that you posted this on the internet. Also she's a dumb irritating bitch and you are a touchy-feely wimp. Neither is very attractive.
August 29th, 2008
(-3)
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(-3)
you are married and you go on ytmnd? how old are you?
August 29th, 2008
(-1)
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(-1)
Would you consider anally raping her, then when the authorities come down own you, claiming that it was consentual?
August 29th, 2008
(-3)
A: "So I don't punch you in the face" = you lose... thsi wont help you B: she is still a bitch, create a seperate bank account now and start squirreling awya money... C: DO NOT GET THAT BITCH PREGNANT D: DO NOT STAY MARRIED TO HER FOR 7 OR MORE YEARS.... then she gets half... of everything... including your social security...
August 30th, 2008
(-1)
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(-1)
You sound like kind of a whiny pussy. That's probably what turned your wife into such a bitch.
August 30th, 2008
(0)
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(0)
P.S. I listened to the entire thing
August 30th, 2008
(0)
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(0)
This argument occurred during the Honeymoon.
August 30th, 2008
(-1)
I'm filing a lawsuit to get that 15 minutes of my life back.
August 30th, 2008
(1)
smash (smsh) v. smashed, smash·ing, smash·es v.tr. 1. To break (something) into pieces suddenly, noisily, and violently; shatter. See Synonyms at break. 2. a. To throw or dash (something) violently so as to shatter or crush. See Synonyms at crush. b. To strike with a heavy blow; batter. 3. Sports To hit (a ball or shuttlec*ck) in a forceful overhand stroke. 4. To crush or destroy completely: smashed all resistance.
August 30th, 2008
(0)
Also, ninja-f*cking-master
August 30th, 2008
(-1)
gtfo
August 30th, 2008
(1)
you should make a site about it
August 30th, 2008
(-3)
slap her with your dick it will solve everything. believe me , i know im a chick
August 31st, 2008
(0)
I can stop listening ...
August 31st, 2008
(-2)
kick her in the c*nt. not really, you are LUCKY that you have someone to call UR WIFE... a lot of us dont even have that privilage. so slap her in the face and tell her to wake the F*CK UP. u two should be glad u have each other and try to make it work. respect each other and do things out of love for one another. if u cant, maybe you dont deserve each other and should be shot.
September 1st, 2008
(0)
IM NOT AN *SSH*LE! YOURE THE *SSH*LE! ALL MY FRIENDS AGREE WAAAAAHHHH
September 3rd, 2008
(0)
this is so good
May 31st, 2008
(2)
i still thinks its funny. "that's irrelevant. I'm fine"
August 30th, 2008
(-1)
Why are you people fighting over who talked first? Sometimes, people just aren't meant to have a relationship. Obviously this "sometimes" applies to you two. But to be completely honest, you're both acting like babies.
May 31st, 2008
(9)
your wifes voice is like a knife in my ear
August 31st, 2008
(0)
two knives, in each ear
September 2nd, 2008
(1)
that makes four knives
May 31st, 2008
(0)
LOL "all of our fights are caused by you" -braxton
May 31st, 2008
(0)
Dude this is me only not married
May 31st, 2008
(2)
except I dont let her think shes ever right
May 31st, 2008
(0)
LOL!! PUNCH HER DAMMIT!
May 31st, 2008
(0)
best audio ever my friend. fav'd
May 31st, 2008
(0)
thanks dude...i didnt think anyone would be able to make it through it. i might do animation but i dont know if this is more funny or disturbing
June 1st, 2008
(-1)
FUNNY
August 29th, 2008
(-1)
i wanted to make it throught the whole thing, but just couldnt... i seemed too familiar and annoying
June 1st, 2008
(-1)
you need to get her some more friendly booze. or weed
June 3rd, 2008
(0)
its funny, then it gets f*cking annoying. Still dont have kids.
June 3rd, 2008
(-2)
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(-2)
yeah if we do have them ill be sure to keep them away from lester
August 29th, 2008
(-1)
You can try, but he can f*ck anything he wants
June 3rd, 2008
(0)
That means means no more "My drunk wife" sites?! WTF
June 4th, 2008
(5)
Dude, she had a f*cking addendum. DON'T INTERRUPT HER ADDENDUMS
September 1st, 2008
(0)
ADDENDUMBS
June 4th, 2008
(-1)
man, you guys really shouldn't drink together anymore.
June 5th, 2008
(-1)
I'm sorry, but this is funny, and disturbing. She reminds me of a less sober version of my mom. It's funny cause she over reacts too much. Good luck Braxton on the possible divorce.
August 20th, 2008
(-1)
this is why Im glad my wife doesn't drink, our fights sound bad enough as is, both of us think we're right when neither are, that would be x10 if she drank... /whew, dodged that bullet.
August 29th, 2008
(1)
I'm celebrating. I'm officially divorced!
August 29th, 2008
(0)
This site never gets old by the way
August 29th, 2008
(-1)
It sounds like you're arguing with a really pissed off Joan Cusack.
August 29th, 2008
(2)
Should've married a guy if you live in California.
August 29th, 2008
(0)
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(0)
lol should've smoked some weed, it doesnt turn people into bitches.
August 29th, 2008
(0)
I mean have her to smoke it.
August 29th, 2008
(9)
she offered to let you punch her in the face and then divorce her, you should've jumped on that
August 29th, 2008
(4)
That was just a clever ploy, she's a ninja master who can defend herself
August 29th, 2008
(0)
he should punch her in the face while she's sleeping.
August 31st, 2008
(0)
yeah then we'll see who the real ninja master is
August 29th, 2008
(-2)
I cant tell if this is real
August 29th, 2008
(3)
This is why I don't believe in relationships and why prostitution should be legalized.
August 29th, 2008
(0)
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(0)
I should point out that I've never been with a prostitute. I didn't know the Bunny Ranch existed when I was visiting Reno a few years ago.
August 29th, 2008
(12)
thats why im gay
August 29th, 2008
(0)
I have a Little sister like this.
August 29th, 2008
(1)
hot
August 29th, 2008
(-1)
Ahhh.. Marital Bliss <3
August 29th, 2008
(0)
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(0)
an organism? you two went to college didnt you?
August 29th, 2008
(1)
I probably listened to this several times because I forgot what I hadn't heard already.
August 29th, 2008
(1)
you guys are *ssh*les
August 29th, 2008
(-1)
geez...this was like 3 months ago. how are things now/?
August 29th, 2008
(4)
YOU INTERRUPTED ME I WAS TRYING TO SAY SOMETHING!!!
August 29th, 2008
(-1)
Just play this the next time she has a glass in her hand.
August 29th, 2008
(-1)
ANGER! haw you got 67 dollars for posting a crazy bitch wife spazing
August 29th, 2008
(0)
never try to argue with women dude, you'll always be wrong no matter how right you are
August 29th, 2008
(0)
Wow! Were they really fighting over something so trivial and childish? Both of you were just vomiting stupidity and my brain hurts now for having listened to it. F-Marrage!
August 29th, 2008
(13)
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August 29th, 2008
(1)
That c*nt needs to be set on fire.
August 29th, 2008
(-1)
Eh, your both participating in this stupidity. Granted your other drunk wife sites were funny and painted her as more of the antagonist. This one has you both acting like sh*t.
August 29th, 2008
(0)
this site interupted me from paying attention to my girlfriend. now shes pissed.
August 29th, 2008
(-1)
OH SH*T!.."it's a very delicate LCD screen and you just smashed it down!" HAHAHA
August 29th, 2008
(-1)
and the "F*CK YOU, F*CKER" was a nice touch
August 30th, 2008
(1)
I did not SMAYSH the laptop
August 29th, 2008
(2)
You know what she needs? Ortega's Taco Sauce.
August 29th, 2008
(-1)
Because that's what real women need EEEHHHIGHNNHYYY
August 29th, 2008
(-1)
I can't even begin to comprehend why someone would accept living with someone so f*cking petty. What the hell is wrong with you?
August 29th, 2008
(-3)
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(-3)
You sound kinda gay when you said, "That's irrelevant...". LOL...just sayin'
August 29th, 2008
(3)
tl;dl
August 29th, 2008
(1)
what a retarded argument
August 29th, 2008
(0)
Crazy *ss f*ckin whitey
August 29th, 2008
(0)
I am not sure who you are trying to incriminate here dude, you were fanning the flames just as much, if not more. If being right about "who interrupted who" is more important than your marriage... good luck with that.
August 29th, 2008
(0)
divorce site: you're doing it wrong. where are the naked pictures
August 29th, 2008
(-2)
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(-2)
August 30th, 2008
(-1)
you guys need to chill and play some mario
August 30th, 2008
(-1)
Hide the booze from your wife.
August 30th, 2008
(-1)
Sorry to sound rude, but what the hell made you think she was the one? And it definitely wasn't her charming voice I can tell you that much.
August 30th, 2008
(-1)
omg... i feel so sorry for my boyfriend. I tried to use the same excuse when we had a fight once. F*ck trying to prove a point. Arguing is a huge waste of time! But she is out of bounds. Way over the top bitchatude.
August 30th, 2008
(0)
"You are such a baby and child about stuff."
August 30th, 2008
(-4)
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(-4)
neither of you should drink... actually nobody should... this happens to everyone who tries to talk to the opposite sex while drunk.
August 30th, 2008
(-1)
this is long and pointless, irrelevant and a waste of time.
August 30th, 2008
(6)
AKA marriage
August 30th, 2008
(1)
That's irrelevant!
August 30th, 2008
(0)
If I were you I'd back off, be cool and leave her alone when she starts getting stupid. If she's acting like a child, don't give her attention. Don't react to it and especially don't apologize. You know, be mature and be a man.
August 30th, 2008
(0)
Marriages like this one happen and people are always sreaming how it's -gay- marriage that'll ruin the meaning of marriage. The only reason people fear gay marriage is because we gays would make it look too easy. This site only reassures how gay boys like myself have it easier not having to deal with women. :P
August 30th, 2008
(0)
This sounds like me and my ex :( Also, Braxton, I think you just kept the argument going in hopes of it getting really heated so that you could post it on YTMND. It really was a pointless argument, and you shoud have have stopped it a lot sooner. You know, just hold your tounge and walk away, especially if you really love her and want to remain married. That also doesn't mean be a complete pussy, but if you wanna stay married you gotta learn how to stop arguing over bullsh*t.
August 30th, 2008
(0)
Boy this sounds like my last relationship... My ex turnes into this bullsh*t when she drinks and causes fights over the stupidist sh*t. And yes I'm having flash backs.
August 30th, 2008
(0)
Wow, that was dumbest thing I've ever heard. You blame her for being the cause of all your argument, yet fail to notice how much your childish behavior directly contributes to the perpetuation of those arguments. Take some advice dude. Learn when to shut up. Life is a lot smoother when you stop trying to be right all the time.
August 30th, 2008
(0)
Now this is the part of your relationship where one of you needs to man up, realize that you are arguing over something stupid, and just end the fight, by any means necessary. You need to use your gusto and charm to change the subject back to something that will calm her down, or she needs to realize what a bitch she is acting like, and just drop it.
August 30th, 2008
(2)
=[ I hate this fighting.
August 30th, 2008
(1)
i feel sorry for your neighbors
August 30th, 2008
(0)
Also, you should learn to drop it and wait until she sobers up in the morning to continue it
August 30th, 2008
(0)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(0)
Pee in her butt.
August 30th, 2008
(-1)
that is why i'm so picky with women. i would never marry an ugly/fat, and i sure as hell would never marry an ignorant bitch like this one because if some sh*t like this happened, i wouldn't be able to stop myself from choking her
August 30th, 2008
(-1)
Dude... this is the stupidest argument ever. You both argue like little girls.
August 30th, 2008
(0)
a baby and a child? serious buisiness
August 30th, 2008
(0)
Man up and punch that bitch in the face. She has a horrible whiny monotone for a voice and nothing she says leads to anything, it's just bitchy horse sh*t. Also I sense some daddy problems there, maybe daddy interrupted her when she was younger. Get that bitch to counseling, but not on your dime. good luck with the murder!
August 30th, 2008
(0)
i want to see video
August 30th, 2008
(0)
also, ninja-f*cking-master
August 30th, 2008
(-1)
That was the whiniest, stupidest argument I've ever heard. I couldn't listen to more than 20 seconds. Grow the f*ck up.
August 30th, 2008
(0)
She "doesn't like her sentences interrupted"? Divorce!
August 30th, 2008
(1)
chowdah sh*t man thanks for sponsoring this...just got back from a 4 day hospital stay and was like...why the f*ck is this site getting so many comments? then i saw it was on sponsored but nsfw...that is a generous donation...
August 30th, 2008
(0)
Did your wife just say Lawl during the first minute?
August 30th, 2008
(0)
Someone needs Dr. Phil
August 30th, 2008
(0)
and these sites are not fake or scripted. we are not that good of an actor. my wife really is that much of a drunk. here's her in action if you don't believe me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ED_UQWOsE_w
August 31st, 2008
(-1)
Dude, at minimum, you should try to get her off alcohol and figure out what she's actually pissed off about. Not to be f*ggy, but there's something inderlying, and she's f*cked up over it. Might not even have anything to do with you. She's your wife, dude. Even if she's an *ss to you, you owe her help with whatever her problem is. Not that I'm any better at this sh*t than you are.
September 2nd, 2008
(0)
I have to agree with the pussy above me. My marriage ended because I ignored my wife when she came to me with her problems. I told her I had enough of my own. Go find a therapist, I said. After a while the resentment built up on both sides. We got divorced. I'm no f*ckin' Job.
September 2nd, 2008
(0)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(0)
agreed.. unless shes fat or ugly... then go ahead and get the special ".38 caliber divorce"
August 30th, 2008
(0)
It's fine to communicate about problems but you guys took this too far and childlishly. Should've just dropped it and maybe talked about it without getting angry the next day. Not my marriage though.
August 30th, 2008
(2)
$67.67 is an awesome number
August 31st, 2008
(-3)
pussy
September 1st, 2008
(0)
you're a prarrarararar whatever you said
August 31st, 2008
(0)
...
August 31st, 2008
(1)
braxton be honest those 2 are your parents
August 31st, 2008
(0)
You both are idiots.
September 1st, 2008
(2)
tell your wife im her biggest fan
September 1st, 2008
(0)
look up the definition of smash
September 1st, 2008
(2)
this site makes me want to get married, seriously
September 1st, 2008
(2)
so that I can beat my wife
September 1st, 2008
(0)
i hate your wife
September 1st, 2008
(2)
I HAD AN ADDENDUM
September 2nd, 2008
(0)
"That you're a ninja f*cking master!!" LOLOLOL!!! On a serious note though, I agree with her on the interrupting thing, but it does sound like she took it a little overboard and did a bitchy slam of the laptop and storm upstairs when the situation didn't really deserve it at all. Maybe a, "Um, could you maybe not be a douche and interrupt me?!", but not a laptop slam/storm upstairs. Then of course it probably escalated from there. So, the interruption was your fault, she over-reacted and turned
September 2nd, 2008
(0)
a mole hill into a mountain imo. I mean interruption CAN be a mountain, but it doesn't seem like that was the case here.
September 2nd, 2008
(0)
F*CK YOU F*CKER! You can't override her talking. She had a f*cking addendum man! Seriously though...I know how you feel...
September 3rd, 2008
(0)
What voice recorder do you use?
September 3rd, 2008
(0)
braxton, you're such a baby and a child. But seriously, good luck with your marriage.
September 3rd, 2008
(0)
Wow is this uncomfortable to listen to.
September 3rd, 2008
(0)
So this is how it happens. How sh*tty...
September 4th, 2008
(0)
I've been married for 2 years and have never had such an unproductive childish fight. But then again I also don't get that slobbering drunk. You need to sit her down while she's sober and talk about the drinking...it seems to be kind of out of control.
September 5th, 2008
(0)
max made you featured lmao
September 5th, 2008
(0)
The voice...like daggers in my ears. I feel so sorry for you. Sympathy 5.
September 5th, 2008
(0)
"She got the ring, I got the finger."
September 6th, 2008
(-2)
you both sound tarded, learn to debate
November 25th, 2008
(0)
January 12th, 2009
(0)
The best part of this is actually imagining how the "fight for my life" dialogue went down
February 11th, 2009
(0)
YOU INTERRUPTED ME!
May 14th, 2009
(0)
Wow, she knows big words like addendum.
August 19th, 2009
(0)
You both sound like little bitches. Annoying to say the least.
August 20th, 2009
(0)
agreed
November 11th, 2009
(0)
boring >:0
March 1st, 2010
(0)
The definition of smash(ed)
March 2nd, 2010
(0)
I like how almost 2 years later, braxton's still getting comments.
July 6th, 2010
(0)
Why spouces murder each other... mystery solved.