dontreallycare doesn't really get it.

Rocks

ok, i looked up gnosticism in the dictionary, and i still don't know what you're talking about. it would help if you explained.

The dictionary might not be the way to go, try GOOGLE or WIKIPEDIA.

christianity sucks

LOLRELIGION

islam is worse

HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE

bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

lol1'd

1. I don't understand this YTMND. 2. I looked up gnosticism in the dictionary, google, and Wikipedia, and still don't understand this YTMND. 3. This is a religious YTMND. 4. HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE. 5. This is a religious YTMND, so 1, GTFO, STFU, stop posting on YTMND now please.

The term gnosis is a Greek word expressing a type of understanding or consciousness gained through personal experience. It is through this type of transcendental experience that followers of Gnostic belief systems seek escape from ignorance. . Basically all the people who came up with their own beliefs by their own experiences were slaughtered. If this never happened, Christianity today might not be so god damn preachy and in your face.

ok?

You get a 5 for spend 50 bucks on a ytmnd. lol

Gnosticism is just about the only branch of Christianity that isn’t insufferably illogical or inherently contradictory. No wonder it’s been actively suppressed for last two millennia...

Yeah, probably the most pertinent medieval tapestry to date.

Nice could have used any number of beliefs for this one. Still for the most part Western Society has reigned in the power of its religions. Certain countries atill do this stuff. Wish the whole world could agree to disagree amicably.

I can't figure out if this is insulting Christianity or not. But you get a 5 for self-sponsoring $50.

50$ LOL! that ni99a is crazy

Well it was true. They burned pretty much everyone who was openly non-Christian.

What I find hilarious is that you have to go back hundreds of years to find church-approved (not wack-approved) acts of violence committed by Christians, and people still view Christianity as a violent religion today. It's not like non-Christians have never been violent, either.

Orthodox Christians hated Gnostics back in the day. I've been reading about Gnosticism for the past year or two, so yeah.....

inside joke.

You paid our bills for an entire week with that sponsorship!

bad

TRUTH!

...sort of.

"Well, thats why europe got the black plague. HEHEHE, God likes revenge." That or he has a sense of humor.

MOAR LIEK THE CLASICAL TROOTH ABUT CHRISITANITY M I RITE? -2

*ahem* Classical era, I should say. The Middle Ages began with the fall of the empires at the end of the Classical era (500s) and ran to the beginning of the Gothic era (1300-mid1500s), though the Gothic era is sometimes considered to be a part of the Medieval era (which, fundamentally, is glaringly incorrect). Emporer Constantine legalized Christianity in 313 AD. So you're off by a good 200 years. 3 stars for effort tho

Gnostics are the type of guys who run around telling people they know secret things and the only way to get this super awesome knowledge is to join up. Thus, they create a nifty power structure around themselves not unlike a pyramid, in which so-called "knowledge" is doled out in small increments based on your level within the system. Sound familiar? It should.

50 bucks sponsoring your own site? LOL? fail.

1 Gnostics were old-school scientologists. 2 they were all long since gone by the middle ages.

DefenderofFuture: No they aren't gone. They are still around.

Religion should die. All of it. Specifically "God's Messengers" such as Peterguy, Whetstone, and anyone who supports them. I don't care if it's on another site, but for GOD SAKES (lol, irony), this is a HUMOR SITE!

Um they(Gnostics) were heretics not blasphemers. Better example would be the Cathars.

Lol you have the Cathars in the descript, missed that. I'm glad my ancestors burned the Gnostics, they deserved it. Also Knights Templar had nothing to do with Christianity, it was the French King owing them alot of money and choosing to kill/imprision them all to reneg on his debt.

Please have my 5s.

5 = 5

gay

This should go under whetstone's Christian Martyrdom ytmnd. Oh, wait, they're not considered Christians because they're being murdered by the people who are called Christians. Oops.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gnostics

There will always be people who use religion as an excuse to try to justify malevolent actions against others, but you also have to remember that even without religion these same people would have found another way to do the same thing and just use something else as an excuse. You also have to remember that there are always exceptions to this and there will be an opposite, honorable action taking place that will go unnoticed over the wretched one. In summary, humans are far from perfect.

lol christians are psychotic past what you could ever imagine

catholics, man. catholics.

HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE

medieval, ftw.

LOL, gnosticism

Gnosticism: the way Christianity should be. In stead we had retards fighting about cutting the tips of people's penises off and what's right to eat.

hahaha. the king is holding a holy hand grenage. ALSO WOW 50 BUCKS TO YTMND! thats a hefty sum! 4!

grenade*

People always say Islam is worse... Well, it is if you compare it to now, but more people have died by Christian hands than Islamic hands in our many years of misery. Islam isn't officially worse than Christianity until the death toll by Islamic hands becomes undoubtedly larger.

I can't believe it's not butter.

Someone read da vinci code a wee bit to many times.

Ah, thank you, religion class, for teaching me about the gnostics. FYI, they believed that the God of Israel was a lesser god. They're the ones who believe that the Old Testament God is really Satan, or something f*cked up like that. Needless to say, they were purged by the prevalent orthodox Catholic theology that emerged in the 4th century.

With all these novel length religious ytmnds, it's refreshing to see one that gets straight to the point. Also, you self-sponsored this for $50, so nice job! I love seeing people sponsor religious ytmnds. ANY time period in Europe before the Renaisance was barbaric, with the possible exception of classic Greece. And the Romans killed everyone. However, just because a group was persecuted still doesn't prove that what they believed was right. >_>

religious YTMND=1 no matter what stand it has. Self sponsoring your YTMND is just wrong.

aint those the guys who got gospels of jesus as a kid? where he pushes a kid off the roof and kills him? boy, you sure donated the hell out of this, for one of the many many many many groups of people the catholics killed. Hardly a distinction at all. Perhaps you should have covered gnosticism, instead of combustion.

Yeah. Gnostics are pretty f*cking gay for the most part. Only the guys at the very top really know anything, and basicly they use that knowledge to trick everyone else; they're predators. But hey, that's life.

V'd Fore Thine Victory!

Everything is better than Islam, even that godforsaken scientology.

hehe

no need for this. Roman Catholicism did not abide by Christian doctrines for the purposes intended by Jesus in this scenario. therefore, it is incorrect to attribute it to Christianity, the roman empire should be blamed instead

Meh. Heretics are always fun to burn. Crusades were better, though. God wills it.

i feel sorry for zin-uru, wasting a perfectly good $48.25

http://evilprophet.ytmnd.com/

F, These sites are f*ggish.

3 for historic reference

terrible POS and even worse for self-sponsorship.

This religion sh*t is kinda getting on my nerves.

lol 1'd, you know what you could have done instead of making a YTMND about something that a religion did WAAAY in the past and doesn't do anymore?? You could have made a YTMND about a stupid religion that did sh*t like this WAAAY in the past, and UNLIKE Christianity, STILL DOES IT - Islam. Islam sucks, Christianity is an awesome religion.

the medieval period started in 500AD... the roman empire ended in 476AD

Haha, this made me laugh, and I learned something! 5~!

The gnostics were all dead before medieval tapestries were invented. :)

check out http://wowgotpwned.ytmnd.com/ :O

It's true, the medieval era came after the murdering of Gnostics. However Gnosticism has, was and will ever be alive. It was hidden in secret societies, the Knight's Templar took the knowledge of Gnosis from the heart of Jerusalem during the crusades. While someone may or may not categorize them as 'gnostics' this doesn't change the fact that they knew the secret of alchemy, which is kundalini yoga. This alone is the reason why when the Templars were killed, their leader prophesied the king's death.

Alchemy/Kundalini Yoga is biblical. Study these verses for starters, but make a concerted effort to study the compendium at 'gnosticteachings.org'. 1 John 3:9 ( !!!! ) Leviticus 15:16 Galatians 3:16 1 Corinthians 6:9 1 Corinthians 6:19 John 4:7-18 (when asked for the living water, Jesus tells her to call her husband....) John 3:5 Mark 12:10 (the stone is a metaphor for sex/christ) Hosea 4:6 Luke 11:9 Luke 21:19 (Patience, not dunked in river water)

HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE HOLY SH*T NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS RELIGION SH*T ANYMORE

good thing i r agnostic lol

The only reason Islam exists, is because the Gnostics were killed. The holy gnosis was the direct lineage of the truth which was to be a new Exodus out of Jerusalem, but Europe and Rome trampled it under foot. So RADICAL, MILITANT Islam was the only way of preserving the gnosis and knowledge of 'Al - Chemy' (chemistry of Allah) in that part of the world. If people understood, and STOOD UP FOR gnosis, which is the secret and core of Christian doctrine, the war with Islam might fade into non-existance.

haha

Thank you.

Christianity sucks.

Heh

Since its true³²³²³² i have to fav it.

Heh, look at all the circlejerking "LOL RELIGION HURR" guys. Look at them and their deep understanding of everything. Nobody else could possibly understand as much as they, the non-religious type, could. And they are mighty and lol at everyone else since they're so cool and hip and don't like religion.

Holy crap, this is depressing when people don't know what going on in that scene...

Funny, but self sponsored, so 2.

Money money, power power. Sing it faster by the hour. Plug your ears and Close your eyes so they can't show you it's all lies. BLEARGH.

Modern truth about atheist fundies: A little BS, a lot of hypocrisy, a f*ckload of selective disclosure.

Sponsoring your own half-true anti-religious YTMND= 1

just love each other, and you'll be doing the right thing. thats all whatever out there wants, love. now please oppress these ytmnds and let's stick to nedm or something dumb like that.

People don't research history. They don't research theology. They don't research anything. They blindly follow one teaching that's easiest for them. It is in no regard to them how truthful it is, or factual, but rather only to their own personal truth does it matter. It chills one to the bones to see such reckless disregard in the name of religion. Idiocy and hypocracy abound in these matters, a lack of understanding calcifying common sense and basic logic. It's saddening when people don't understand life.

Also, for the record, Gnosticism is dead. While definitely superior to Christianity, it's still flawed fundamentally as it still takes the Sumerian myths and incorporates them into their own stories as "divine truths" just like every other religion on Earth. Until people understand the Sumerian culture and how every world religion emanated from our first society, religion will continue to be raped and poisoned by zealots and blasphemers.

didnt look at ur ytmnd but with enough cash and f*ggot friends you can become the next dr-leet

zin-uru: IMHO you've just demonstrated that you are just as brainwashed as all the other religious nuts. Gnostics aren't the good "guys" anymore than your average mob boss or scientology leader, and you would know that if you had half a brain left. The only dynamic to keep in mind is predator vs. prey.

Arktis, actually Gnosticism was the competing religion with Christianity. It was fundamentally salvation based on knowledge. This meant Gnostics had higher level educations i.e. they were literate. They were much more knowledgable when it came to theology and were privy to knowledge normal Christians could not even comprehend. If you absolutely had to pick a religion, Gnosticism is the absolute best. It's basically Christianity with a brain and common sense.

3'd. I get it, and it's clever. But it's just another one of these stupid religous YTMNDs.

This isn't funny. It's also stupid.

The Romans didn't go after Gnostics, they went after all Christians and any other "superstitio." You're understanding of the topic shows you've probably read The Da Vinci Code and know absolutely nothing about Roman History. By the time Rome accepted Christianity, which may or may not have been with Constantine, the Gnostics were already a dead sect and by custom of the people, the books we currently have in the Catholic Bible were selected.

And then there was some funny.

"ONE! TWO! FIVE!" "Three, sir!"

"People don't research history. They don't research theology. They don't research anything. They blindly follow one teaching that's easiest for them. It is in no regard to them how truthful it is, or factual, but rather only to their own personal truth does it matter." LOL HURR RELIGION AM I RITE?

PWNT you religous pricks

4'd for pissing off retards.

Martin Luther>The Pope

Oh, for those of you who didn't read Pope's controversial speech attacking Islam from September.. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14848884/

Yeah, that's pretty much the midievil truth about Christianity, alright.

Lol, totally true. Midevil Mainstream Christianity sucked, big time!! And by suck I literally mean drain the economic well beaing and general man power out of Europe. Take infant baptism: in Roman Catholacism people could only be taxed after baptism. What better way to get more money than having a "Being Alive" tax by baptising babies. +5 Midevil Mainstream Christanity sucked, Baptists r0XX0rz

and i used to think canon was only a printing company -- it's true that, especially after the fourth lateran council was set down there were a number of heretic-hunts since the people now had a papal description of what 'heretic' really meant and all that went with that, but this ytmnd neglects other developments such as the cult of saints that formed in the vacuum of the fall of the roman empire around the 5th century. but i understand that as a medieval site,.. there's a one frame/one joke precept

"Gnosticism is just about the only branch of Christianity that isn’t insufferably illogical or inherently contradictory. No wonder it’s been actively suppressed for last two millennia..." Somone obviously has no real experience with Christanity at all if he can believe this statement. Much less if he's the one who makes it.

No, Omniscience, YOU just don't care and are arrogant enought to think that only people who think just like you are normal.

"Oh, for those of you who didn't read Pope's controversial speech attacking Islam from September.. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14848884/" Oh yeah, and if you didn't catch al those Islamic terrorists killing people for no apparent reason other than being alive and not Muslim, try reading a news magazine sometime (Newspapers are too pansy to really report about the really nasty murders).

religion in ytmnd, gtfo!

Holy f*cking sh*t. YTMND has become a breeding ground for religion bashing. It was ok back when people just poked fun of the different religions for comedy purposes (ie. Raptor Jesus). But now it's just stupid.

OMGAWD! Catolics never killed ANEBODEY! Neither did any other Christians, except for George W Bush in the holy war.

where do you guys get all these???

i really get annoyed by the rantings of the neo-gnostics/neo-arians. you think they'd have learned after st. agustine of hippo, but nooo...

You overlooked the fact that Rome had been obliterated by the arrival of the medival era. Christianity was -the- faith of the Western European world, save for the soon to be converted pagans.

Lol, none of the atheists, neopagans, or NARVs can spell medieval!

Alchemy/Kundalini Yoga is biblical. Study these verses for starters Nice work quoting random verses out of context. I'm sure I could prove anything I wanted to by taking bits of a book at random (and possibly changing words or metaphors if need be). Mark 12:10 the stone is a metaphor for Christ yes. Sex no. If you read from the start of 12 there's nothing about sex in there. Luke 11 - its about prayer not asking for some hidden knowledge (Read Luke 11:1-13)

"Self sponsoring your YTMND is just wrong." Whoa, whoa... so supporting YTMND is wrong? Sure, he used it to get this on the front page, but you'd rather not see him sponsor it and max NOT get the 50 to keep this site alive? You're an idiot.

The hosea reference in context is about them not knowing the difference between good and evil. I'm not sure what the John verses have to do with any of your points. 1 Corinthians 6:9 is about how once you were wicked but have been forgiven by Jesus' work on the cross (v11). And while you're quoting from 1 Corinthians check out 1 Cor 1:18-25. The core of CHRISTian doctrine is Christ, not some hidden pyramid scheme bullcrap.

Yay for Lunzo.

boooo

+5 for killing gnomes

-2 for sponsoring your own site.

5 for lols and 5 for truth.

k

religion on YTMND, FTL.

stupid sh*t

-2 for massive self-sponsorship

lol atheism

HAY EVERYONE LETS HAVE AN OPEN-MINDED RELIGIOUS DISCUSSION IN THE COMMENTS OF THIS YTMND, AND COME TO UNDERSTAND ONE ANOTHER'S POSITIONS BETTER THROUGH THE PROCESS OF THOUGHTFUL DEBATE

Um.... ya, I don't usually say this, but f*ck you for insulting my religion. Argue about something that matters athiest.

1 FOR SELF-SPONSOR YOU LIFELESS F*G! 1 FOR SELF-SPONSOR YOU LIFELESS F*G! 1 FOR SELF-SPONSOR YOU LIFELESS F*G! 1 FOR SELF-SPONSOR YOU LIFELESS F*G! 1 FOR SELF-SPONSOR YOU LIFELESS F*G! 1 FOR SELF-SPONSOR YOU LIFELESS F*G! 1 FOR SELF-SPONSOR YOU LIFELESS F*G! 1 FOR SELF-SPONSOR YOU LIFELESS F*G! 1 FOR SELF-SPONSOR YOU LIFELESS F*G! 1 FOR SELF-SPONSOR YOU LIFELESS F*G! 1 FOR SELF-SPONSOR YOU LIFELESS F*G! 1 FOR SELF-SPONSOR YOU LIFELESS F*G! 1 FOR SELF-SPONSOR YOU LIFELESS F*G!

Seriously

Yeah, terrible things have been done in the name of Jesus Christ, but Jesus taught us to love our enemies. Mohammed? Well, I think heaven has run out of virgins by now.

http://holysh*tter.ytmnd.com/

As a former Gnostic, member of the Temple of Ouroboros and of the Knightly Order of Achamoth, I give you a 5. ^_^

lol anti christianity websites = -infinity hahaha its so funny cuz its retarded.

Truth, but failed at humor. I just don't find any of these things funny...

Five for silent G

My understanding predates the DaVinchi Code by about 10 years, and no I haven't read it. It's a load of bull times 2, the only positive purpose it serves is to prompt people to ask questions. Thanks for the assumptions... I began by researching sites about Gnosis because of a deep interest in ESP, and Kabbalah, and esotericly related material from medical doctors who've witnessed strange things, to the stories of St. Germaine I picked up in the library. All of this caused me to deeply question my faith

Please don't badger me with overt literalism. I used the word: 'Rome' to represent the Catholic church, which is the inheritor of all the ego-maniac power of the Roman Empire, vicariously transferred into a slightly different paradigm.

It's true, Mohammed was no gentle lamb, but the sole existance of the word in that entire area of the world was being wiped out. There are verses in the bible which call for the children of the wicked to have their heads bashed on rocks, but we don't take that literally do we? The fact of the matter is that if you want to find violence in a religion, Judaism would be a great start. So much violence came to be simply for the fact that God needed to re-establish a place whereby his truth could be taught.

Those romans sure knew how to party.

Again, if you have questions about the Ialdabaoth (lesser demiurge called God in the old testament) you need to understand the context it was portrayed as, and why. Understanding deeply the relationship between deities and people, what words are interpretted in the bible for which deities and what mistranslations occurred will help alot. Biblical scholars will even tell you that God: 'Yod-Hay-Vav-Hay' (4 characters) and the demon 'Jahveh' were incorrectly percieved as meaning the same thing.

If you TRUELY want to understand the etimology and metaphors which constitute the makeup of the bible, then go to the site I provided: 'gnosticteachings.org'. At least hear the arguement presented in the audio lectures. Its seriously seriously deep. Yes they do use the myths from other religions, but they clearly, cohesively and concisely present the stories as allegories for the very truth about the arcanum, tarot, kabbalah and alchemy/kundalini yoga that they're teaching.

I'm also just going to say this. I sponsored this not just because it's what I believe. It's what I've truely experienced. The force which is christ/sex, is something I've utilized to perform a work. It was powerful, it manifested corporeally and it nearly scared the hell out of me. I stopped being a black-magician at that point and later on found this site about the Gnosis of SAW which outlined distinctly everything I'd experienced and read about up until that point.

As for the quotes about bible verses, since I've been questioned about it, I'll gladly oblige an answer to them. Correct me if any of these verses are misquotes, as I took the time to look each one of them up for myself, I'm 99% sure it was all accurate:

These religion sites are just causing everyone to expose how ignorant, self-centered, and or bigoted they are. The people leaving comments are often worse than the sites or the people who create them. Every once in a while someone says something intelligent, but other than that people are just proving their own idiocy.

The Gnostics of SAW don't emphasize the God in the old testament with the same animosity, we understand that the "Ialdabaoth" demiurge is a characature of the creator (and other things) explained in detail here: http://www.gnosticteachings.org/forum/index.php?showtopic=1629&hl=ialdabaoth IF YOU WANT TO UNDERSTAND that issue you 'need' to read that post.

The Nag Hammadi Library was also something I invested ALOT of reading time into. In the 1940's alot of the Dead Sea Scrolls were dug up and eventually put on disaplay intact (except for burnt parts). The Pistis Sophia, The Gospel of Judas, The Gospel of Thomas.... etc. etc.

"Alchemy" does not mean "chemistry of Allah". In arabic, "al" means "the". "Allah" means "The God". "Alchemy" comes from the Arabic "Al-Kimiya", which means "The Khemeia". Khemeia was the earliest form of Alchemy and was developed by Greek-Egyptians who were attempting to transmutate iron and lead into gold. It developed into classical alchemy and, later, chemistry.

One essential thing to know is where Gnosis and so-called 'Orthodox/Fundamentalist' Christianity differ. Tertullian..... the church father who misinterpretted scripture concerning Lucifer and Satan. Satan is a characature which the Jews created to describe the human ego (not unlike other many kabbalist metaphors in the bible) but because "Lucifer" is the very means by which anyone can become an angel, Lucifer and Satan then therefore are synonymous with angels.

People like Whetstone doesn't realize that his preachings create hatred to people who didn't give a damn about Christianity to begin with. Later on, they piss off someone with even greater power, and genocides happen.

I blame you, Charlemagne! Divine right at work, you get a 4 for burning people at the stake. Hail Xenu! Also Poland

could have been better, but it still made me grin.

In truth, Lucifer is the spirit and substance of sex itself, which is ANGELIC. Satan is created by Lucifer when someone fornicates. (Ego and sin are created each time a person orgasms). In the bible where the person asks: "oh lucifer how art thou fallen, you thought to raise yourself up", the narrator is reflecting on his own misfortunate 'accident', or the mere misact in general.

1 John 3:9- "Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin; for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin, because he is born of God." (NIV) This is too obvious for words folks.

Leviticus 15:16- "When a man has an emission of semen, he must bathe his whole body with water, and he will be unclean till evening." Ok, first off this implies that any man who orgasms is unclean, period. Is there a distinction between a man who orgasms in his wife, or whatnot? None, but to bathe his whole body in water.... why? Parasites from the astral plane. Leeches feeding off your soul.... Back then people didn't even have STD's (don't quote me on that), the reason is purely non-physical.

Galatians 3:16- "The promises were spoken to Abraham and to his seed. (notice that the very word 'Abraham' seems to contain the etimology of the Hindu phrase: 'not a Brahaman' (or deity), keep that in the back of your mind for a second) The scripture does not say "and to seeds," meaning many people, but "and to your seed." meaning one person, who is Christ. " Ok, now we know that Abrahams seed (semen) had promises given to it because it was christ. Traditionally this is read as a lineage thing.

But in alchemy this can also be read to mean that Abraham, who was practicing the 'sacred work of alchemy' had his seed promised to (because of the work of transmutation which it had gone through) and it had 'become' christic. Meaning simply that since he transmuted his semen through the channel of the spine, into the brain to become a solar force, it was changed from lead into gold (from demonic into christic). This Christ personage is that living force, the living water, spirit, God.

This is how you can have a bunch of Christians gathered at Sunday to celebrate communion over a piece of bread that supposably has 'Jesus' contained in it. The 'personage' of that bread is the force of 'christ'. So it's not surprising to interpret the verse as meaning a description of a living and intellegent force as a person when in fact it doesn't necessarily take a humanoid form.

At least where the Catholics are concerned, if the priests ACTUALLY knew that the christ force was in the sex itself, and not simply conjured by rituals, maybe they'd practice pranayama or kundalini yoga in order to utilize it similar to the way quigong masters utilize their 'Chi', INSTEAD OF RAPING YOUNG ALTER BOYS.

1 Corinthians 6:9- "Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders." So not only in the Old Testament tabernacle times was orgasm something which made one 'unclean' but a similar expression is given here, affirming that any kind of sexual descrepency renders one completely removed from the kingdom of heaven.

1 Corinthians 6:19- "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own" This quote is interesting, because in fundamentalism, supposably the holy spirit is the thing which gives people gifts of the spirit, talking in tongues, performing great miracles etc...... but 20 centuries of chaos and dividing sects, and all manner of mundane evil are abound because the holy spirit, in the temple of the body, is the sex itself.

John 4:7-18 A Samaritan woman is asked by Jesus for water. jesus offers her living water from which she will never thirst, which will "become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life". The woman says "sir give me this water" JESUS'S RESPONSE TO WAS TO ASK HER TO GO CALL HER HUSBAND. If this doesn't clue you in, nothing ever will friend.

John 3:5- "Jesus answered, "Truly, truly I say unto you unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God." The sexual fluids are water which contain spirit, baptism is a symbolic ritual of a greater baptism. Abraham's seed was said above to be christ.

Mark 12:10- "Haven't you read this scripture: "The stone the builders rejected has become the capstone" Jacob laid his head on a stone, to see angels rising and falling. Jacob wrestled with an angel until morning. He wrestled with the kundalini yoga, thats what PEOPLE DO AT NIGHT TIME UNTIL THE MORNING, The stone is sex, sex is the spirit of christ. CHRIST IS THE CORNERSTONE. Is anyone catching onto the sheer depth of this yet? If Christ was simply Jesus, how did Jacob lay his head on that stone??

Hosea 4:6- "My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge because thou hast rejected knowledge I will also reject thee that thou shalt be no priest to me seeing thou hast forgotten the law of thy God I will also forget thy children." Gnosis is knowledge, knowledge is necessary. The Catholics prevented people from reading the bible. Even Jesus said, whoever prevents these children from comming to me, it would be better if they had a millstone around their neck, and be tossed into the sea.

Luke 11:9- "I tell you, keep asking, and it will be given you. Keep seeking, and you will find. Keep knocking, and it will be opened to you." Seeking the knowledge is also a necessity, not simply slouching into atheism or assuming that some church will save your soul by dipping you in water. You're better off becomming a Jew, and following some 'other' ritual like cutting off your penis tip. Different 'ritual' same result.

Luke 21:19- "In your patience possess ye your souls" Patience, not dunked in river water and a belief. Faith is not belief. Faith is the sum of belief and experience, experience of the supernatural. If you do not experience the SUPER-natural you are not performing the 'work'. Works without 'faith' is dead, meaning if you're performing a 'ritual' like dunking people in WATER to save their soul, meanwhile they don't experience supernatural events in their life, they don't have faith.

Proverbs 23:31-32, says, "Look not thou upon the wine when it is red, when it giveth his colour in the cup, when it moveth itself aright. At the last it biteth like a serpent, and stingeth like an adder." If Jesus had turned water into intoxicating wine, then He would have caused others to look upon the wine when it is red, opposing the wisdom of Solomon. Since, Jesus is "greater than Solomon" (Matthew 12:42), He would know the wisdom of sobriety and would not tempt others with an intoxicating drink.

The water he transmuted into wine, is the same lead the alchemists claimed to change into gold... The story of the wedding at Canaan is a metaphor for the work which is a secret. Metaphors abound even in the parables of Jesus, to the extent that one would even wonder how many metaphors the life of Jesus represents (hinted to by the myriad of prophecies that Jesus fulfills from the old testament in his lifetime)

Whoah. A dozen replies. All big ones! On with the HURR RELIGION AMIRITE?

5 for the title alone

THAT KING HAS A HOLY HAND GRENADE1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The pope needs a bigger hat.

If you think Christianity began with Rome then you're a dumbass and need to go back to history class.

4 for at least a fundamental knowledge of history. Looking at these psots, i have to set my expectations of people even lower...

Enough is enough.

Does anybody remember the god old days before religious ytmnds? I'm sick of all this f*cking squabbling about political correctness and faith and all that crap. Can't we just either say "believe whatever the hell you want" or, better yet, just leave the whole issue to websites made for that kind of thing?

-4 for wall of text

The romans killed christians before they created Catholisism to unify the roman empire.

I wasn't going to vote on this one, but your use of innaccuracy, out-of-context quotes, and what basically amounts to name calling earns you a 1.

I think my 1 button is broken.

You know, until I saw you quote all that scripture, I was going to 4 your page. Unfortunately you have revealed yourself to be the religious zealot that you are.

Ahh, the Knights Templar. A king owed them too much money so he bribed the pope to help him kill them all. Gotta love those ancient Christian ethics.

The Middle Ages do not reflect true Christianity because the Church, which was basically established to stop infighting and bizarre interpretations of the scriptures, had become corrupt and full of self-centered people. Christianity (yes that includes Catholics) is against self-centeredness and has long since changed its ways. Speaking of bizarre interpretations... :-

PEOPLE WHO DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS SITE ARE MORONS PEOPLE WHO DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS SITE ARE MORONS PEOPLE WHO DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS SITE ARE MORONS PEOPLE WHO DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS SITE ARE MORONS PEOPLE WHO DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS SITE ARE MORONS PEOPLE WHO DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS SITE ARE MORONS PEOPLE WHO DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS SITE ARE MORONS PEOPLE WHO DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS SITE ARE MORONS PEOPLE WHO DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS SITE ARE MORONS

its funny cause its true

I'm confused..... what are you talking about??? and the romans beleived in Jupiter and all thse other gods didn't they? What the crap???!?!?!? none of this makes sense?!?!?! I AM CONFUSED!!!! WHY WONT EVERYONE JUST SHUT UP AND GO BACK TO MAKING STUPID SH*T!!!

NO MORE RELIGOUS THREADS

self sponsorship = 1

Valid and humorus response. I'm surprised whetstone hasn't replied.

I didn't say Christianity began with Rome did I? Obviously it began with Jesus.... Moreso I was pointing to the fact that the 'truth about christianity IS GNOSIS', you've seemed to miss the point there. Obviously since Gnosticism ended (for the most part) with the Roman scourge, then making a scene depicting that would be relevant, no?

I only presented the: 'wall of text' as a response to those with questions and criticisms. Duely note those and then proceed to not condemn the holy text wall, thank you.

To Mouseman: yes the Romans believed in polytheism. Judeao-Christian religions tend to be monotheistic. But the WHOLE TRUTH of the matter is that all religion is entirely "monistic-polytheism" and this is presented to us in Gnosticism. Gnosticism predates Christianity but is no doubt the origin of it. Gnositicism is the very root from which religion itself was engendered, inasmuch as Gnosis by definition represents the very truth taught at the core of all religions, even those in sublime antiquity.

F*cking sponsored ytmnds, just one trolling religious piece of sh*t after another. F*ck you, sir.

Let me make a small note about 'Pagans' in relation to Christendom, as the topic has been brought up about the Roman's believing in a pantheon. Understand that religions all are born from a single source, the truth, and gradually degenerate as the society which facilitates them falls out of the sacred practice. Even the Paganism that is feverishly hunted for it's "witchcraft" was at one time practicing the 'holy magick' of sacred alchemy. Druidism was holy, Wiccanism is ignorant.

Thanks for dissing me, 'sir' at least I presented the site in all of it's glorious irony, irony which is so common on YTMND. So what people? I sponsored my self? go back to your hidey holes and wish you had money to sponsor your stuff. If you HAVEN'T NOTICED theres been talk lately of shutting YTMND down because not enough people sponsor. So your response is to bash me? Go hang yourselves, I just kept your favorite SH*TS and GIGGLES domain from kicking the can for the next week....... r.e.s.p.e.c.t

religous YTMNDs fail......... weather advertising or insulting....they JUST fail, please leave the internet.

I am giving you five because what you are saying is fascinating. Self sponsorship is bad?? WTF?? Okay, someone give me a reason why. Actually that's cruel of me to ask such a tough question - nobody can.

OMG not again, keep YTMND clean of this stuff.

fail

It's a YTMND with a message, AND it's not funny. Double whammy!

Christianity >>>> Judaism >> Scientology

The alchemy statements are almost true. The Persians were extremely advanced in alchemy, but you'll never hear about it cause the Greeks completely f*cked up persian history. Go read around, you'll see what i mean. Greeks claim the impossible in battle and such. The persians were the first to gold plate standard metals btw.

hahaha, actually, it was the christians who were the ones martyred and perecuted and burned at the stake. It wasn't until an established imperialistic Europe after the Dark Ages that people started their violent conversions. but really, how many people actually converted to christians when you have someone in your face saying "convert or die" why not just lie?

Guys, give him a break. This is the best religious ytmnd in awhile, because at least he's making references to the allegories and metaphorical value of the bible rather than taking the stories at face value. Also, connecting all religions with psychological theory and citing influences from literature such as Plato's Republic, Socrates, and Aristotle makes a f*ck of a lot more sense than trying to blindly defend beliefs with blind faith. This actually makes sense, why are you bashing him?

This would be why I'm not a part of any organized religion. No, not because they do things like this, but because people are such f*ckwits about it on either side. 2'd for blindly following the fad.

"F*cking sponsored ytmnds, just one trolling religious piece of sh*t after another. F*ck you, sir." You're not complaining about numbskulls paying YTMND's server costs to put up something you're not obligated to read, visit, or even acknowledge the existence thereof.... are you? Come on, we know you're not THAT stupid.

i agree, down with christianity.

Jddo onrshmf dudqxnmd. Fsf, rgzkk ad azbj kzsdq sn kztfg lnqd. :)

hooray for historical inaccuracy

" The only reason Islam exists, is because the Gnostics were killed. The holy gnosis was the direct lineage of the truth which was to be a new Exodus out of Jerusalem, but Europe and Rome trampled it under foot. So RADICAL, MILITANT Islam was the only way of preserving the gnosis and knowledge of 'Al - Chemy' (chemistry of Allah) in that part of the world." That is the most ridiculous crap I've ever heard.

where can i get this song? plz pm it to me

I don't understand what this is supposed to be. So here's a 3. That rhyme was not intended.

Thank you roq, you're the man now dog.

+3 for the brain wash, -1 for the author giving money to his own site

Concerning alchemy and changing metals into different forms: The Persians, Greeks... Alchemy wasn't a chemistry of metals, it was a staged smokescreen of a religious system intended to illustrate the practice of kundalini yoga to the secret initiates, kept a secret away from those who might persecute and destroy. Alchemy has to do entirely with sex, and the things which point to otherwise are simply part of the elaborate diversion.

Ahhhh I don't like learning

hahahahah

Uhm ... just a word of advice on the English of the day? When using a verb with the word "thou", the verb conjugates to have an -est ending, not an -eth (used for he or she). Thus, "Thou acceptest," not "thou accepteth." Just thought you ought to know.

Done, and loads faster. Thanks.

I am a christian, but I still find it funny. Plus you even took the time with the grail the king is holding in the background :)

Gnosticism FTL.

-1

to Magejutsu: Just right click the background, and hit 'view source'. In the txt hit 'alt + E' and search for the letters: 'mp3', or 'wav' depending on what it is. You'll most likely go directly to the part of the site's script where the URL for the music is contained.

religion, lol.

Whether it was an "elaborate diversion" or not, alchemy (which does NOT translate into "chemistry of Allah") identified many chemicals and their properties, and led to modern-day chemistry and medicine.

LOL DRUIDS! They used to predict the future by looking down at someone's doorstep, then looking straight into the doorway and making their prediction based on the location of the objects in the room!

It does, the etimology of the word 'chemistry' comes from the meaning of it's root 'chem' which in ancient times was another name for Egypt. 'Al - Chemy' is the science whereby the ancient practice of kundalini was done by followers of Islam. While modern chemistry is a byproduct of the erroneous misdoings of the medieval ignoramuses who heard about alchemy but mistook it for it's literal context, it doesn't change the fact that true alchemy wasn't about changing metals.

If you'll notice while researching alchemy's history, the claim was always made that 'someone' knew how to change lead into gold, and the belief that it could be done was always highly optimistic. Meanwhile all these people were trying to figure out how to do it. Why? Because some alchemists from the Persian world passed along a story (a parable in allegory) about alchemy. Most likely even in their own society, there were Persians who took the story literally.

Study images and banners from the medieval era long enough, and you'll discover that theres usually a graphical depiction of what can be interpreted as a 'caduceus' diagram or chakras of the spiritual body, demons in the lower beaker to be heated, or the sun and the moon above a man and a woman, the act of alchemy itself is completely sexual, and pertains only to applying heat (copulation) without orgasm, in order to burn the demon and change the energy into a different state as it rises.

Spirituality and the notion of God is always abound in this imagery and alchemical texts. The tree of kabbalah is usually represented by what looks like a willow flower that has two vertical rows of buds and a bud on top, with as many bulbs as there are spheres on the kabbalist tree of life. Research that site, there is a vast depth to alchemy in relation to the understanding of the tarot and the kabbalah, it's very deep.

4. -1 for sponsering own site for $48.25

I'm personally reminded of my research into the life of the famous inventor Nikola Tesla, the father of alternating current. Tesla was attributed to many great ideas (some blueprints of which burned by his rivals such as free energy). Tesla as a youth was divinely inspired by an alchemical text called: 'Goethe's Faust', in the text there is no literal connection to ideas about electricity, or chemistry. I tend to think the connection was supernatural.

Einstein's theory of relativity is widely said to be a result of reading an article on occultism, this was broadcast on the History channel.

who spends 50 dollars on a site?

You god damn gnostics are worse than whetstone's ilk. Sure there's some knowledge to be had but it all has to be deciphered because of the way it's put forth and mixed in with all kinds of psuedo religious nonsense. Gnosticism is a cult forming poison. You people never come out and actually say things directly, because that would destroy you by compromising your power base and letting people in on your little tricks, thus giving away any advantage you have. Eat a bowl of dick, go f*ck yourself and die.

Christian persecution in Rome does NOT equal medieval (this point in Roman history was several hundred years prior to medieval times). FACT CHECKING IS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD! Also... sponsoring oneself to get into the sponsored list? Tsk. This DESERVES a downvote.

I've already explained how the templars represent the gnosis in the medieval era, thanks. As for comming out and directly disaplaying all of the wisdom of Gnosis, this has been done here: gnosticteachings.org. If you took the time to study what it was we believe, and why, in the volumes of info presented there, you might not be bashing the faith.