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Picard gets high and jams his fucking ass off

jeanlucpufnstuf

(CNN)Michael Cohen served loyally as Donald Trump's right-hand man for more than a decade, taking care of anything and everything the New York real estate baron needed to get done. On November 8, 2016, Cohen's stock suddenly soared: He was now the personal attorney to the President-elect of the United States, with unique understanding of a man that everyone was scrambling to get access to. Cohen quickly got to work. According to multiple people familiar with Cohen's conduct following the election, he aggressively pitched himself to potential clients, reminding them of his proximity to the most powerful man in the world. Those efforts landed Cohen lucrative consulting deals. New reporting this week revealed that in the months following the 2016 election, Cohen received hundreds of thousands of dollars from powerful entities based in and outside of the United States. "I don't know who's been representing you, but you should fire them all. I'm the guy you should hire. I'm closest to the President. I'm his personal lawyer," was how one GOP strategist described Cohen's sales pitch. One company that Cohen immediately sought out was pharmaceutical giant Novartis. "He was shopping himself around," a source familiar told CNN. Cohen would ultimately land a one-year contract with the firm by promising access to the White House on health care policy. Inside Michael Cohen's aggressive pitch promising access to Trump By MJ Lee, Javier De Diego, Sarah Westwood, Marshall Cohen, Gloria Borger, Sara Murray and Dana Bash, CNN Updated 6:33 PM ET, Wed May 9, 2018 Anderson Cooper: It seems moronic for Cohen Current Time 0:16 / Duration Time 1:49 Now Playing Anderson Cooper: It... WASHINGTON, DC - DECEMBER 13: U.S. Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein testifies during a a House Judiciary Committee hearing on December 13, 2017 in Washington, DC. (Photo by Zach Gibson/Getty Images) Rosenstein to Trump: You're not a target Attorney Michael Cohen arrives to Trump Tower for meetings with President-elect Donald Trump on December 16, 2016 in New York. FBI raids Trump lawyer Michael Cohen's office Who is Michael Cohen? Attorney Michael Cohen arrives at Trump Tower for meetings with President-elect Donald Trump on December 16, 2016 in New York. Michael Cohen talks FBI raid with Don Lemon avenatti michael cohen trump fixer Avenatti: Trump picked the wrong 'fixer' Michael Avenatti newday 2 04092018 Avenatti: Trump shot himself in the foot trump hot mic billy bush video bus exit Times Trump accepted the 'Access Hollywood' tape Michael Cohen and Stormy Daniels Stormy Daniels sues Cohen for defamation Now Playing Anderson Cooper: It seems moronic for Cohen rudy giuliani fox news Giuliani: Trump repaid Cohen for Stormy payment Trump: No knowledge of Stormy Daniels payment Stormy Daniels attorney Avenatti Stormy lawyer: Trump won't serve out his term michael avenatti 04262018 Stormy's lawyer: Trump implicated himself Trump: Cohen case doesn't have to do with me Michael Cohen walks down the sidewalk in New York, Wednesday, April 11, 2018. (AP/Seth Wenig) Michael Cohen under criminal investigation

aggress

Facebook instituted its biggest executive shakeup in its 15-year history this week, appointing new leaders for WhatsApp, Messenger and Facebook’s core app while giving other longtime Facebook executives new responsibilities, including a new effort to tackle blockchain technology. The moves, which were announced internally to employees today, are meant to improve executive communication and user privacy, but the changes also come as Facebook contends with the backlash from the U.S. presidential election, revelations of manipulation by the Russian government and the recent Cambridge Analytica scandal. CEO Mark Zuckerberg has reorganized the social giant’s product and engineering organizations into three main divisions, including a new “Family of apps” group run by Chief Product Officer Chris Cox, the executive previously in charge of the core Facebook app. Cox will now oversee Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp and Messenger, according to multiple sources, four social apps with a combined reach of more than five billion monthly users. Facebook is also building a new team dedicated to blockchain technology. David Marcus, the executive in charge of Facebook’s standalone messaging app, Messenger, is leaving that post to run the blockchain group, these sources said. That new team will fall under one of the other three divisions, referred to as “New platforms and infra,” which will be managed by CTO Mike Schroepfer. Facebook’s AR, VR and artificial intelligence efforts will also live under Schroepfer’s division. Longtime Facebook exec Javier Olivan, the company’s VP of growth, will oversee the third division, called “Central product services,” which includes all of the highlight_2 highlighted">shared features that operate across multiple products or apps such as ads, security and growth. Surprisingly, no one appears to be leaving Facebook. Just a lot of old faces in new places. You may have noticed from the diagram that almost all of Facebook’s top product and engineering execs are men. That’s true, though Facebook does have a number of high ranking and influential female product executives that aren’t directly involved in these changes. For example: Fidji Simo, who runs video; Deb Liu, who runs Marketplace; and Julie Zhuo, who runs design. Then, of course, there’s Sheryl Sandberg on the business side of things. The changes all come at an interesting time for Facebook and Zuckerberg, who has been openly discussing his need to take more responsibility for Facebook’s impact on the world. Zuckerberg’s New Year’s resolution was to fix Facebook, and restructuring the team is clearly part of that fix. The hope is that these new roles will keep more open lines of communication among executives without hurting the speed Facebook is known for. (“Move fast and break things,” remember?)

executiveshuffle

testytmndforjc

The way he moves his body to accentuate every syllable...lol. Also note the horribly fake punching going on in the background, lower left.

endlessgermanbane

Gospel dog loves jesus more than silver and gold

Jesusgold

EPIC DOMAIN GRAB on this American Idol parody, although the GIF itself displays it as "American Idle". This site I made is educational, and illustrates the drama that occurs when FREE ENTERTAINMENT activism gets advertised. This site is an edited version of an old flash cartoon from Newgrounds that was about Gary Brolsma and Numa Numa, but instead includes singer/songwriter Suzanne Vega, whom is known as "mother of the MP3", and even this site itself uses an MP3 file for it's audio, so respect and honor is key to this. This site has a storyline with American Idol judges Randy Jackson, Paula Abdul, and Simon Cowell. This site features a sample of the song Tom's Diner, the song used to aid development of the MP3 file format. For shits and giggles, I even included some subtle Leonard Cohen references (but not Goatse references, since that would have made this NSFW). I also made some references to the new jack swing music genre since the DNA remix of Tom's Diner gave the NJS sound to an a cappella Suzanne Vega song, and also note that Paula Adbul made some new jack swing tracks back in the day, and it seems like Simon Cowell doesn't like the mother of the MP3 hence his preference to have rusty nails shoved into his ears.

AmericanIdol

LOL!

deadspace3

DARTH STAPLER CHANGES HIS HAIR TO A BUNCH OF DIFFERENT COLORS EXCEPT NOT REALLY BECAUSE HE DOESN'T HAVE HAIR JUST A HELMET ALSO HIS STAPLER MIGHT CHANGE COLORS EXCEPT IT NEVER DOES FOR UNIMPEACHABLE REASONS

rainbnooooooooooooooooo

Leonard Cohen wants to hear his Suzanne song and dukes it out with Lyor Cohen who wants to mute audio from the Internet, just like how Warner Music Group muted audio from YouTube, then FREE ENTERTAINMENT activism came to YTMND in response to that, yeah it's a long story as to why.

placeneartheriver

Spock and his ladyfriend have decided that the weed is good. The high is high. It's time or a break. Let's get fly.

breaktimeonthebridge

more of a low-fi really, but i get by with it

hifi

letsago plays his own jazz composition on guitar

jazzsong1

Credit to Jonathan Schoemaker for his pic that I remixed.

PokemonStatue

A mashup of Steamed Hams and Feel Good Inc. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aRsOBFhNjVM

Steamedhamsinc

Eric Bana unveils his banana bandana cabana.

ericbana

This is how one feels when extremely bad news is presented.

NoGodNoGodPleaseNoNooooooooooo

a canadian and his dog

canadiantriforce

UGOFF IS ON TV AND HE TURNS INTO DARTH STAPLER EXCEPT HE IS MISSING HIS STAPLER BECAUSE THE OTHER DARTH STAPLER IN THE SAND HAS IT WHICH YOU CAN'T REALLY SEE WITHOUT VIEWING THE FULL IMAGE

require

Trump reminisces on his days of playing in the Mos Eisley Cantina.

trumpcantina

hi my name is Ziltoid and this is my favorite gif thanks for watching

pooflower

highlight_1 highlighted">Arnold met his match

dogdisposal

Bernie Sanders had his own idea of making America great again, but Donald Trump thinks otherwise.

bernieshock

a 90s kid chugging his computer

chug90

A beautiful remake starring everyone's favorite guy with a turd on his eye and his hideous best friend

brokebackshiteye

you can tell by the way he use his walk

tateralive

Wililam Shatner promoting Keanu Sausage on Robot Chicken. He can't start the day without awesome sausage "in [his] mouth".

keanussausage

With his buddy Paco

shitswimming

QF struggles to save his taco

qftaco

a guy with his Plymouth Prowler floating in space

spaceprowler