Giant Oceans of Calcium
Created on: March 2nd, 2007
Giant Oceans of Calcium
We think we can describe the wonders of the universe by taking high defintion pictures.
Joy

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Inbound links:

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11 http://www.reddit.com/search?q=stripper+gif&restrict_sr=off&sort
9 http://www.reddit.com/search?q=stripper+gif
7 http://www.reddit.com/r/WTF/search?q=quadriplegic&sort=relevance
6 http://www.reddit.com/user/nutnics/submitted/
5 http://www.reddit.com/search?q=wtf+quadriplegic&restrict_sr=off&sort=relevance

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March 2nd, 2007
(5)
WTF?
July 19th, 2007
(-3)
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(-3)
imagine how hard the stripper scrubbed himself later that night, trying to get the retard off of him.
July 19th, 2007
(1)
WTF is right
July 29th, 2009
(0)
this site would of been better with just the music and the cars exploding in the background
July 30th, 2009
(2)
$111 is rich? Do you live in a trash can?
August 3rd, 2009
(0)
He's saying it because normal people don't spend a hundred dollars on YTMND you dolt
August 3rd, 2009
(2)
BANGIN ON A TRASH CAN
August 4th, 2009
(0)
DRUMMIN ON A STREET LIIIGHT...
March 2nd, 2007
(6)
you have an aesthetic. That's more than can be said about most around here.
March 2nd, 2007
(1)
Look, a pizza
March 2nd, 2007
(1)
what....the....f*ck...
March 2nd, 2007
(5)
5 for making no sense
March 2nd, 2007
(-7)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-7)
I hate you.
March 2nd, 2007
(1)
The universe is pretty wondrous. However, I think you have a point there. Quality of content over quality of display. Little known fact: That guy left soon afterwards. Less known fact: They hired me for the "afterparty".
March 2nd, 2007
(0)
Oh, wait, also I hate you. And I can't quit you.
March 2nd, 2007
(13)
commentary on exploitation and voyeurism. the girls with palsey are used to being objects of scorn and ridicule and are gawked at. The dancer is used to be gawked at for different reasons. Put together we are aware of the ways in which we gawk at different things for different reasons, much like a traffic accident that we watch for the pleasure of seeing a crash (see NASCAR events where people go for the promise of violence) thus the video game in the background featuring a simulacra of exploitive voyeurism
July 15th, 2007
(2)
I'm not so sure voyeurism is really the point here. Your interpretation fails to account for the implicit theme of the passage of time (the Happy Birthday balloons, the source citations). Not to mention the interpretation given by the site's creator in the description. Prior to editing this graphic was presumably a high-definition picture, a still moment and a picture of someone's life (hence the inclusion of birthday balloons)...
July 15th, 2007
(2)
Whoever took the picture had the same understanding of this event as the person that hired the stripper, which is that it will be funny to get these tards a stripper, which indeed it is. The site description is, for me, a response to that intention, and the edits in the graphics don't obviously follow the same interpretive line of reasoning as the photographer's, however good their original intentions were. The music is especially misleading---it may be techno but it's too mellow and serious to match.
July 15th, 2007
(2)
The same can be said for the image and sound citations, which are each overly-sentimental reflections on the passage of time. This sort of comes around again to the point of immortality our willingness to condense "the wonders of the universe" in photograph form. The significant aspect of the video game going on in the background really isn't that it's a car crash, but that it's apparently got bitchin' graphics and the explosion is stopped mid-motion, like a photograph, referring again to the site desc.
July 15th, 2007
(2)
For these reasons (and a few more but I'll shut up) I think the site's creator is sending up the photographer and the photograph, without really touching on the more obviously humourous aspect of the photo. If we think of what's going on from the point of view of enjoying life, of "living in the moment," so to speak, we can understand the lasting significance of what's happening, of these "wonders of the universe."
July 15th, 2007
(24)
more cowbell
July 16th, 2007
(-8)
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(-8)
lol ambulo you f*cking fail
July 16th, 2007
(6)
Indeed. Needs more cowbell
July 16th, 2007
(10)
ambulo we are BFF now. Thnaks for the analysis. However, all these things you brought up are totally after the fact. This whole site was created without these considerations, but they seem to be contained within somehow even though I didn't see them. Sometimes we can derive meaning out of inherent symbols within a constructed art from. These meanings aren't contrived, they just need someone to pull them out.
July 16th, 2007
(8)
Wow. All I could concept of this was some palsey chicks looking at some naked guy who was projecting Burnout 2 with his c*ck.
July 16th, 2007
(0)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(0)
Click, you can't deny that the optimism of the source citations and site description are out-of-keeping with the ridiculousness of the image. That's my starting point. I'm seriously disinterested in problems like authorial intention, since meaning in art is only created through the experience of its audience. But I also think it's criminal that this is your worst rated site, as it's the one that's probably haunted me the most.
July 18th, 2007
(0)
+15 for confounding the white man.
July 18th, 2007
(0)
[ comment is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(0)
I want to karate chop the english professor who taught you to be so analytical
July 22nd, 2007
(1)
damn, debates on the internet are longer than they should be sometimes
July 25th, 2007
(0)
Ambulo... Total mindf*ck... and I consider myself intelligent. You bring it to a whole new level that is far beyond my mental capacity.
July 27th, 2009
(0)
Cool story, bro.
July 27th, 2009
(0)
ambulo is a great man, and he is too smart to be on a site like ytmnd.
July 30th, 2009
(1)
Over-analyzed. A few tards are enjoying the show, that's all. They aren't looking for any deep meaning and neither was the creator. Seems random and isn't worth one hundred dollars.
July 30th, 2009
(2)
This is why modern art museums are filled with sh*t like Duchamp's toilet. Modern criticism is more concerned with discussing randomly assorted found objects than objects created through the craft of art, which means that you could find more pieces worthy of interpretation in a landfill than in the Louvre. While this is fine if you're an archaeologist, it is not if your aim is elevating true art into the canon. This is what happens when cultural criticism crosses the sacred threshold of aesthetics.
(1)
Found art: Transforming the onus of art from the original artistic creativity of artists to the artistic interpretation of the critic. Also bullsh*t.
March 2nd, 2007
(-2)
Ahahahah
March 2nd, 2007
(6)
5 for guy's critique
July 15th, 2007
(2)
agreed
March 2nd, 2007
(1)
this is f*cked up
March 2nd, 2007
(3)
guyfawkesrules thinks he's a badass but HE COULDN'T EVEN EXPLAIN THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THE BALLOONS. Balloons are nature's sign that helium takes us higher. It makes things lighter, like our head, so we rise, like the pitch of our voice, above the trappings of the sensationalized world, portrayed by the flashy crashy video game(y). JUST KIDDING that's all bullsh*t. The only point to this site is look pretty colors and PALLSIES AND THAT GUY'S BALLSIES.
April 7th, 2007
(-1)
http://touchscreen.ytmnd.com/ This site is the best obliquely symbolic site on YTMND. Better than anything from Klasky, Female, dyskrasia, and dare I say it, roy4l.
March 2nd, 2007
(4)
Korf thinks he's a Giraffe because he talks about helium like he wants to be up high in the sky and be up there with the Giraffes but he cant so he takes on a tiger-like persona with which he thwarts NARVism and Noobs on the frontpage of YTMND but he'll never be as great a superstar as guyfawkes cause guyfawkes explains things in YTMNDs that other people wouldn't normally be able to figure out also balloons.
July 18th, 2007
(2)
I just find it amusing that people are constantly searching for deeper meaning in things that contain none. However, I'm a bit of a literalist myself, which I suppose makes for a sh*tty artist. But to me, if the creator contrived the piece with deep and hidden meanings, then they are there. Any insane conjectures from onlookers are just bullsh*t. I only 5'd this because the creator admitted it was made with no sort of grand artistic statements in mind, yet a few people whipped up rambling monologues
July 18th, 2007
(0)
proclaming the untold mysteries contained within which were only revealed to their brilliantly creative minds. lol, intellectual arteests
July 19th, 2007
(0)
I am a pretentious f*ggot. But you are a Philistine. Make me a sammich, and ensure that it is not lacking in dead animal tissue.
March 2nd, 2007
(0)
also, fawkes
March 2nd, 2007
(1)
is that a game in the background what game is that in the background (in the background)
July 15th, 2007
(0)
looks like burnout aka best games ever
July 15th, 2007
(2)
yes, it looks like burnout. that game is both really fun and has amazing crash animations
March 2nd, 2007
(0)
what song is this?
April 28th, 2007
(0)
Wolfshiem?
April 28th, 2007
(0)
Confirmed. wundervall- by wolfsheim.
July 22nd, 2007
(0)
wunderbar, wundervoll, superschön, supertoll. wunderbar, wundervoll und ich tanz einfach weit0r.
July 29th, 2009
(0)
the Blank & Jones Remix is better.
March 2nd, 2007
(0)
quite sexy.
March 2nd, 2007
(2)
.... that's kind of sad
March 3rd, 2007
(0)
did
March 3rd, 2007
(0)
Yay.
(0)
lol
(0)
HORNY!
March 3rd, 2007
(1)
March 9th, 2007
(0)
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(0)
March 20th, 2007
(0)
daaaaaaamn
April 12th, 2007
(0)
April 15th, 2007
(-4)
[ comment (and 1 replies) is below rating threshold and has been hidden ]
(-4)
lurk moar. mcnugget.
April 25th, 2007
(0)
A.Maz.Ing. You're an actual artist! Oh, and my official guess for the sound is Wolfshiem! (Am I right? someone lemme know)
April 30th, 2007
(0)
wunderbar, wonderful, super schon and super toll
May 3rd, 2007
(0)
Can anyone clue me in on the music? it's german right?
July 29th, 2009
(0)
Yep, it's Wolfsheim - Wundervoll.
July 15th, 2007
(-1)
does anyone care to take a crack at interpreting the significance of the site's being slightly off-center?
July 15th, 2007
(0)
We find ourselves wondering why that which is offcenter and eschew is the way it is, or "why is that not normal?" Nothing in this site is normal. Is this the answer you seek?
July 15th, 2007
(0)
What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
July 15th, 2007
(0)
Is it carrying anything?
July 15th, 2007
(0)
unladen, dur. lol I DONT KNOW THAT WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
July 15th, 2007
(0)
I remember seeing the middle girls YouTube videos. Amusing to watch her 'dance'. She sort of wobbles around like an egg.
July 15th, 2007
(0)
http://jews.did.ytmnd.com/
July 15th, 2007
(0)
best comment
July 15th, 2007
(0)
Wolfsheim FTW :D
July 15th, 2007
(4)
this site makes me cry a tear from my anus
July 15th, 2007
(-1)
ahhh a refreshing mindtmnd, very nice.
July 15th, 2007
(0)
i'd just love to know what the music is (i know, i'm weird, i like trippy German techno)! PM me?
July 15th, 2007
(0)
Damn that was odd, googling just "wundervoll" I managed to actually find who sings the song, it's: Wolfsheim - Wundervoll
July 15th, 2007
(0)
I just :Owned: myself by not reading all the replies first
July 15th, 2007
(1)
+5 for nonsensicalness if that is a real word
July 15th, 2007
(0)
this is actually kind of cool
July 15th, 2007
(2)
if I was high i could write a great response to this site
July 16th, 2007
(0)
No. Oh wait, Yes.
July 16th, 2007
(0)
Um ... yeah .....
July 16th, 2007
(0)
super schoen und super toll. hahahahahaha....hahahahahhaha
July 16th, 2007
(3)
congrats you can take bullsh*t and throw it together. what a f*cking artist you sure are.
July 16th, 2007
(2)
lol, complete sh*t
July 16th, 2007
(0)
...why is burnout in the back?
July 16th, 2007
(-2)
it's an analogy
July 16th, 2007
(2)
Robert Loggia?
August 3rd, 2009
(0)
ROBERT LOGGIA???
(0)
The units of Planck's Constant are the same as the units of angular momentum.
July 16th, 2007
(1)
WHAT THE F*CK!!!?
July 16th, 2007
(-1)
1d for art
July 16th, 2007
(-1)
5 for the critique
(1)
You know, I don't mind thinking a lot every now and then. Not even on YTMND. But you know what I don't like to do? I don't like having to stare at something for a f*cking hour just to get an obscure and pointless meaning out of symbols the author picked up from things I have never studied or will never have any interest in.
July 16th, 2007
(0)
the main point of this YTMND isn't hard to figure out. it's an attempt at seriously examining what most would at first consider a funny image. it's be like if you took tubgirl or goatse and surrounded it with obscure imagery in an attempt to enhance its significance. it's like the original "you're the man now dog" site done backwards, which is what's so unique about it. if we can take utterances like that from films and deflate their seriousness, can we take funny things and load deflate their humour?
July 16th, 2007
(0)
would an editor please remove the word "load" from my last post, thanks
(1)
If that's the formula, it certainly works in reverse. But why destroy something humorous and make it serious? Just to be original? I wouldn't paint shades of gray over a mural just to make it stand out.
July 17th, 2007
(1)
some people don't dig serious art, and that's cool.
July 17th, 2007
(0)
lol, burnout
July 17th, 2007
(0)
gaytmnd in a good way
July 17th, 2007
(0)
good sponsorship ambulo
July 17th, 2007
(0)
Dann geht die Sonne wieder auf, und ich tanz einfach weiter. Wunderbar, wundervoll, superschön und supertoll. Wunderbar, wundervoll, und ich tanz einfach weiter.
July 17th, 2007
(4)
Then the sun continues, and I dance simply. Marvelously, wonderfully, super+beautifully and super+madly. Marvelously, wonderfully, and I dance simply further.
July 19th, 2007
(2)
Click, you're the next f*cking Salvador Dali.
July 22nd, 2007
(0)
YOURE THE NEXT F*GGOT
July 22nd, 2007
(-1)
click. babelfish?
July 17th, 2007
(0)
Seriously, if there was a GERMANTMND, this would be its gay fuel music.
July 17th, 2007
(0)
Startling Good
July 17th, 2007
(1)
What the hell am I looking at? Whatever it is its my new windows wallpaper.
July 17th, 2007
(0)
Wunderbar!
July 18th, 2007
(0)
deep
July 18th, 2007
(0)
I don't think I want to know.
July 18th, 2007
(1)
...wtf
July 18th, 2007
(0)
I don;t get it, lol. +5
July 19th, 2007
(0)
And sometimes we can...
July 19th, 2007
(-1)
My god. I can't believe how sick this is!
July 19th, 2007
(0)
didnt really get it :P but i liked the song and the girl in the middle....omfg...hottie???
July 20th, 2007
(-1)
+ 4 for donation and -1 for it being really bad
July 20th, 2007
(0)
Amazing, now that's art!
July 21st, 2007
(0)
best site on ytmnd
(2)
K. But you forgot Poland.
(0)
5'd for sheer randomness. major wtfness.
July 21st, 2007
(-5)
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(-5)
lol @ all the pseudo-intellectuals still fiving this
July 21st, 2007
(0)
dann geht die sonne wieder auf und ich tanz einfach weiter wunderbar wundervoll superschön und supertoll und ich tanz einfach weiter!
July 21st, 2007
(1)
I've heard this music somewhere before. Who's the band or DJ or whatever?
July 21st, 2007
(-1)
scheiss musik ehrlich gesagt OMG I SPOKE GERMAN NAZI! !NAZI! NAZI!
July 21st, 2007
(0)
k 5 go away
July 21st, 2007
(-1)
Derka Derka Mohammed jihad
July 22nd, 2007
(2)
i listen to this song for hours while sitting at my desk zoning out
August 2nd, 2009
(0)
yeah ok but is it really worth $111 jesus christ man
July 25th, 2007
(1)
This has confuzzled me. But I think you may be onto something.
July 27th, 2009
(0)
firth
March 21st, 2009
(0)
Never die
July 27th, 2009
(2)
The comment below me is from the past
July 28th, 2009
(1)
The comment above me is from the future.
July 27th, 2009
(0)
YAAAAAAAAAAY! I give this a 1... out of 2.... 1 being best internet porn cafe available to Greek women and children.
July 27th, 2009
(2)
Wow. There hasn't been a massive sponsoring like this in long time.
July 27th, 2009
(4)
who the f*ck spends over $100 sponsoring a ytmnd? what a f*cking douche
July 28th, 2009
(1)
right justified image like whoa
July 28th, 2009
(2)
Did someone accidentally add and extra '1' in their donation?
(-2)
What a waste
(-2)
what? I meant what a waste of money (should have made that more clear). I didn't watch the site.
(-3)
.... o_O
(-2)
weird
July 28th, 2009
(0)
Dorkmo, sh*t man.
July 29th, 2009
(0)
you mean; DORKMO, great taste! $$$
July 28th, 2009
(0)
uuyuduyt
July 28th, 2009
(0)
interesting site to sponsor....
July 28th, 2009
(0)
In response to the description, I can only say /hr/
July 29th, 2009
(0)
Very artistic. I like the random burnout footage in the background.
July 29th, 2009
(1)
5'd for epic nerdy sponsorship
July 29th, 2009
(0)
amazig
July 29th, 2009
(1)
great job on getting over $100 in sponsorships but this site is obnoxiously pretentious.
July 29th, 2009
(1)
not worth $111.11 ... but nice nonetheless.
July 29th, 2009
(1)
I don't get it
July 30th, 2009
(0)
Yes. YES.
July 31st, 2009
(1)
jeez Dorkmo. guess that cash for clunkers deal really left you with some extra cash
July 31st, 2009
(0)
This site reminds me of the time I was caught masturbating at the Baltimore Zoo's monkey house.
July 31st, 2009
(1)
well, the ladies are having fun at least
July 31st, 2009
(0)
everyones kneading for strippers!
August 2nd, 2009
(0)
I think this would be alot better if the stripper was a girl and the people in the wheelchairs were guys
August 3rd, 2009
(2)
Soooo many better sites to sponsor than this one.
August 3rd, 2009
(0)
how the hell do people find pictures like this? Either way, the music sounds like the band Wolfshiem...and that's what i'm trying to focus on.
August 3rd, 2009
(0)
5 for $100 down the crapper